Sometimes I wonder on why I care about… anything.
A few minutes ago, I got a second opinion on whether I am “mean”, and the
answer was “You are not mean, just not friendly. You are supervisor
material.” My retort: “I don’t know if that’s an insult… .”
Then I am considering whether I want to change desks, and suddenly I am
thinking about how that would affect those around me. What do I care? If
they need something they can still get ahold of me; it’s not like I am
asking to move to another building or state, just a different desk.
Honestly, I know the first thing is true: I am not friendly. I am nice, I
think; but I have never been known to be friendly. Honestly, right now, I am
feeling the least friendly I ever have. I am just me, no B.S. I don’t like
frills in my life or around me, and I don’t have any in my personality. I
can get “crazy”, I can be wild, but I am not generally either, nor do I
strive to be.
On the latter matter, I just have to learn not to care. People think that I
don’t, so why should I? It certainly doesn’t help me in any manner to care
about certain things. Some other things, mostly not people, I do care. But,
if it doesn’t concern me, then I shouldn’t care. And I am going to learn to
stop.