I’m not sure which road I’m taking, or where it leads. I just know that I’m standing at a crossroads and anything is possible. 

So much has changed in such a short time. It’s amazing and unsettling to realize that I keep veering off track. The reason is I have no track now. It’s both worrisome and liberating. 

I made plans this year based on a person I haven’t been for almost 10 years. I remembered what I wanted then and decided to seek it. That is not what I want now. If I had not sought it, I wouldn’t have remembered that other fact. 

Interestingly, a lot of what I want today is not what I used to want, or anything I’ve ever wanted before. It’s an adventure. 

I’m giving myself some personal time to figure some things out for myself. I’ve learned a lot about myself in the last several years. It’s not something you can be taught or learn from a book; it requires a lot of awareness, meditation and introspection. As usual, there is always more to learn. Right now, I need to learn where I want to go. 

There are facets of my life that are not so easily deciphered, parts that involve other people. I’m just focusing on the parts that are completely within my control, the parts I can make decisions on without weighing in the wants and needs of anyone else, just mine. 

Sometimes we forget that if we are not happy in our life, we can’t be happy with others and we can make others unhappy as well. I’m happy and I want to stay that way; that requires that I take care of myself and my happiness. Then, I can share my happiness with those who matter most.